“Every negative feeling we hold stems from the lack of self- love.”
Paul Ferrini, THE 12 STEPS OF FORGIVENESS
Self-love is the very heart of self-esteem. Without respecting and caring for the self and honoring our feelings, self-esteem is elusive. We are not implying self-love should take place at the expense of others or in an egotistical manner. Rather, we do want to respect ourselves, because all human beings are valuable and precious, including us.
Self-esteem is an important foundation of the life coaching process. As a professional life coach, I am always watching for self-esteem and self-confidence issues that may surface with my clients. These qualities are a major determinant of success in the world. The absence of these qualities adversely affects our personal, interpersonal, business, and professional relationships.
I often suggest clients check in with themselves, by asking the following questions internally:
- Do I value myself?
- Am I honest with myself and with others?
- Do I maintain good physical and psychological balance and boundaries in my daily life?
- Do I take responsibility for my actions and their consequences?
- Am I able to show humility when it is appropriate?
- Am I able to forgive others and myself and move my life forward?
Only you know how to best care for your physical and emotional well-being. Only you can choose what actions and decisions can help create the life you want…
Staying alert to our thinking and feeling daily, can help us to be more conscious of the beliefs and perceptions that we hold on to. Any negative thinking can cause us to experience unpleasant emotions. Low self-esteem is behind this negativity.
Ultimately, the missing self-love must be supplied by you. This internal work begins with your commitment to self-acceptance! It is never helpful to blame others or conditions in the world for our life’s circumstances. If we can remember to choose both love for others and for us, we are making the healthiest choice for everyone.
Life will always carry challenges and often hardships. However, we can be empowered to choose a positive attitude in each and every situation. This is a mark of a successful life!